How many of these attributes do you have?
This list is about the 7 things that make us real men of God! Not because I say so but because it is how we are commanded to live according to the bible. If we call ourselves Christian men then we cannot be choosy about what we do and do not follow in the bible! They are in no particular order but they are all biblical principles. Drum roll please…
#1, 2 & 3 – Listen, shut up and chilax
- Be quick to listen
- Slow to speak
- Slow to become angry
As men, we are always quick to cut somebody off while they are talking because they are making no sense and we have all the facts! We don’t stop and listen, we always want the other person to just shut up so they can hear what we have to say. We need to “Be quick to listen” first and actually pay attention to what the other person is saying. This will help us to become better communicators because just as we want to be heard so does the other person and this makes it easier to communicate with one another! We also need to be “Slow to speak” & “Slow to become angry” as sometimes our opinions about the matter at hand does not always come out the way we intended! Why? We are angry; that’s why! So we get loud and flail our hands to make sure the other person understands our point. Truth is the point is lost since the other person is no longer listening because of the tone in our voice and the vain on the side of our head that looks like its going to pop! Instead we need to be quite, calm down, gather our thoughts, go over what was said, rationalize the information and breath. This can seem really hard to do and the truth of the matter is, it is hard! Believe me it gets easier as time goes by and then it just becomes second nature. Plus we can always turn to God and ask for peace during these moments.
#4 – Love the Lord your God
To love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul & mind! Jesus was speaking to a Pharisee who had asked the question “What was the greatest commandment in the law”? Jesus replied that it was the first and greatest commandment! What does it mean to love with all our heart, soul and mind? It means just that, to love Him with everything that we are made of.
Our hearts? When we are in love with someone, anyone, say your first girlfriend, you remember her right? When she finally told you to go fly a kite alone, where did it hurt? Your heart, right smack in the chest! We need to love our God whole heartedly. It’s where our feelings are, so to speak.
Our soul? Your soul is that unstoppable force that embodies everything you are. As an example let’s do this thought experiment! With or without your physical body you are still you, right? If we transplanted your head on another person and vice versa wouldn’t you still be you? That you is your soul. A universal imprint of Gods creation that can only be you! We are called to love our God with everything that is our soul or everything that embodies our very existence! Basically all of who we are!
Our mind? The organ in our head that allows us to think, rationalize and make choices by contemplating the outcomes of those choices before we make them! We are extremely intelligent sentient beings when it comes down to life here on earth (Some more than others, but that is a different blog!) We are to love our God with all our mind! Which means that in every way we rationalize or think about our day, God should be at the forefront of our thought process!
Wow, This seems impossible! Of course this is not easy. The point is to make sure we are aware of what it means to love Him as commanded and at least try every single day to do so.
#5 – Love your neighbor
We all knew this one was coming! Look it’s simple, we need to love everyone as we love ourselves! Okay not that simple. When you have people at work, church, in your family or the ball game who are just plain mean, rude or have really bad halitosis (Funky breath). The point is we need to make every possible effort to love these people as called. The love you show them because you are being obedient might be the only love they get from anywhere?! Think about that? If 99% of the people that person encounters ignores them or is short with them all the time and then you came along and said a nice word or offered a hug when saying hello, wouldn’t it probably make their day? If the shoe was on the other foot wouldn’t it make your day? This is the very essence of why we need to love others because God is using us to show those that need love that love is possible! You do not need to become everyone’s best friend just love them as you would love yourself even in your worst times! We have all had them, a bad day, week, month or year! Whatever we where going through, all we really ever wanted inside, was a kind word or gesture! This is what it means to love others as ones self.
#6 – Watch your tongue
We are all guilty of this one more often then not! 3 scenarios to show you what I mean!
- Your running late, someone cuts you off, almost hits your just washed car and you get the red light! You scream at the top of your lungs #*%^@ $%*#!” Right?
- You ate the last Krispy Kreme doughnut that belonged to your wife, she gets home and asks if you ate it? Your answer is “no of course not, I will ask the kids!”
- Your wife asks if you paid that bill so there is no late fee? You didn’t do it! Your answer “yes of course I took care of it”! (You then proceed to take care of it, to late you were charged a late fee #*%^@ $%*#!)
If our son or daughter was in the car then the example we set using that language is very clear! If we would have just admitted to having no self control when around Krispy Kreme doughnuts we would not have to lie about not talking to the kids and later when our wife asks them herself, the kids rat us out that they saw us stuffing our face! In the last scenario the next bill comes and the late fee is present which means you lied to your spouse who asks again I thought you paid it? You would have to lie again or else she is going to call the company and tell them “My husband paid it on time, blah blah blah blah” so you finally admit to it and guess what a fight breaks out because you lied! She is angry at the $10 fee and not eating her doughnut but more than that she is hurt by the lies! How can we be trusted with big issues if we cannot be trusted with the small issues! As for the bad language, if you really must scream something out in order to feel better after an incident, like stepping on a Lego! Use words that are funny and do not make sense by stringing them together in such a way to feel better, something like “Son of a motherless cherry picker, Are you gratifyingly ill, you snot loving, beaver kissing, tree huger!” works for me!
#7 – Love your wife
Men we are called to love and serve our wives as Christ loved the church! Selflessly!!! Our marriages are holy unions formed in Gods perfect will. We must be the husbands we are called to be because it honors Him and it is He whom we serve. We need to make them feel loved, respected, safe, appreciated, special, pretty, sexy, adored, honored, lifted up, holy, set apart & number one! We must stand together in Christ through every tough time and praise Him together with worship in all the good times! My father once told me when I was young, he said “Son, you want to be king of your household there is only one way, treat your wife like a queen and she will treat you like a king” I did not always practice that rule of thumb but now that I do man does it work! I honor and love her because I am called to do so!
One of my growing ministries is to encourage husbands to live a Christ centered life and what that looks like in their marriages and relationships! My wife and I were at the brink of divorce! Were it not for the restorative and healing power of God that we are now not only still married but best friends and most importantly living a Christ centered relationship! Be encouraged everyone and pray for your marriages, plead to The Lord that he use you to begin the healing process! He is in the business of miracles, I know my relationship with my wife is nothing short of a miracle!
Let’s get real men!